Finding Your Biological Parents: Does it Have to be Expensive?

Written by Amanda Houston
Last Updated: 10/6/2020
Finding Your Biological Parents: Does it Have to be Expensive?

Let's imagine you are having a nice dinner date with someone you have never met. As an hour passes, you start to stray away from the light talk such as do you have any pets, favorite food, etc. You then begin to start to talk about your families. Your date informs you that he or she is adopted. You pause. In today's society, we still do not know how to react to this type of information. Do we act saddened, do we act happy? Adoption is something that has not been normalized quite yet. When a woman tells another woman she wants to adopt instead of having her own biological children, most women will shame the woman and try to convince them to have their own by saying things like, "but don't you want your child to look like you?"

Adoption can be challenging to explain to people, especially when it comes to presenting it to the child you've adopted. Some parents wait until their children are at least 16 or 18 years old to tell them they are not their biological parents. It is heavy information and must be delivered in the best way possible. When mothers put up their children for adoption, they are given two options closed or open adoptions. Closed adoptions are when the children and the nonbiological parents have no relation and little to none information about the biological mother and father. Open adoption is when the birth parents agree that their child can have relations with them even if they are not the caretakers.

For people born into closed adoption, I have heard diverse stories about their emotions on the situation. I have some friends who do not want anything to do with their biological parents due to their remorse. While on the other hand, I have friends that have hired private investigators to find their birth parents. However, that can be an expensive way to find out information. Someone close to me did this, and the search lasted for three years, and the overall payment to the investigator was pretty hefty.

I've learned that it is okay to hire an investigator to find out your parent's names and then end it there. There are people search engines like that can give you all the resources you need to find out information on your biological parents. All you need to do is type in your parent's names, and the website takes care of the rest. You will be supplied with their home address, information on their city, their criminal records (if any), siblings, and any other children they might have. It is comforting to know that if you are curious about your biological parents, there are affordable resources out there, such as GladiKnow, to aid you in your person search.

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